Kiss the Dog
by Ayame Kazeai
Summary: Shigure and Mii have a different sort of... "relationship". But with Hatori and Ayame's help (plus Yuki's scoldings), can they make Shigure a better man? The chronicals of a writer and his unhappy editor. [Rated PG for language]
1. Default Chapter

**Kiss the Dog**

By Ayame Kazeai

"Shigure-san..?" Mii asked quietly as she poked her head through the door. Timid blue eyes scanned the room carefully as a delicate hand rolled the door open. The room looked empty, just like all of the others. Empty and incredibly clean. She almost had to do a double check- Shigure's quarters were rarely this nice and clean. From the doorway, she could see a brown envelope sitting on his desk. _Could that be the... the manuscript? No way. _She made her way slowly to the desk, as if she were a tiger preparing to spring upon it's prey. Once she reached the corner, she placed a lacquered fingernail upon the envelope and slowly slid it closer to her. A note on the front of it read "Dear Mii, Here are your pages! Sorry I wasn't around to irritate you this time, I'm simply too busy! Ta ta! Love, Shigure". She let out a gasp. This was different. Her face twisted into an almost scary look of content, and she turned to head out the door.

"AH! Just the person I wanted to see!" a voice chirped from behind her as Shigure popped up from behind his desk, where he may or may not have been hiding. Mii yelped in surprise, and immediately the envelope dropped from her hands. It was like a bomb being dropped in the desert- the second it had contact with the ground, it exploded in a cloud of white. Papers flew everywhere. She turned around with a look of terror on her face. After two hours of being in a quiet house, the sudden noise caught her completely off-guard.

"Oh...Shigure...san...you...you...startled me..." she replied weakly as she haphazardly crashed upon his couch. And much to her eye's dismay, the killer of her hopes and dreams dropped into his chair and suddenly took a very serious look to his face.

"Now Mii. I've been waiting for hours! What took you so long?"

Steam began to rise from her pretty, blonde topped head as her face took a rather unhealthy red glow of doom. "YOU have been WAITING?! I have been here for TWO HOURS, Shigure! TWO. HOURS. I SEARCHED EEEEEEEVERY NOOK AND CRANNY, and even got my poor little ass KICKED by that horrible, HORRIBLE orange haired boy when I accidentally barged in on him in the bathroom!! AND YOU WANT TO GET SMART WITH ME?!!"

"Oooh, scary!" Shigure said with a mock look of fear as he pressed a balled up hand against his lips. He then waved one hand in the air, as if dismissing her words with a nervous chuckle. His other hand reached up to scratch the back of his head, & a boyish grin crept up onto his lips. "Gomen nasai!"

But Mii didn't hear nor see his reaction. She sat there, twitching in anger as if on the verge of a breakdown while tears ran down her flushed cheeks and silent sobs escaped her lips. Shigure loved to torture the poor gal, but he knew her limits. His face fell solemn as he watched her, and he let out a quiet sigh. Yuki's sermon from earlier about how he needed to grow up and stop being entertained by other people's misfortunes (especially ones that he created for them) rung through his head. So, with another sigh, he ran a hand through his short, chocolate colored hair and went to her side.

"Mii.." he said softly.

Her eyes, brimming with tears and pain, turned up to look at him. And in her time of need...her time of desperation... she quietly spoke, asking "Sh-Shigure?"

"Yes, Mii?" he answered.

"Wh-wh-why do you hate me s-s-s-so much?"

He sighed and brought up a finger to her cheek to dry painful tears away. "Well.."

"Y-yes Shigure?" She stared up at him with an expression only comparable to that of a small child being told that Santa isn't real.

"It's because..." he started, but was unable to find his words. He couldn't tell her. He just couldn't. She wouldn't take him seriously, and she probably hated him anyway. But she looked so desperate. So needy. He couldn't say it, but maybe he could show it. His hands grasped her chin, and his mouth neared her luscious lips.

"Oh...Sh-Shigure..." Mii said quietly as she brought herself closer to him. She always had this feeling that the torture and pranks were Shigure's way to show his love3. And deep down inside, she only put up with him because she enjoyed it as well. She loved him. She loved the way he wrote, and the way he cared so deeply for his family. She even loved the way those big puppy-dog brown eyes sparkled moments before he pulled a new prank

And in a moment of lust and passion and love, she pulled him into her arms and cried "Shigure! Kiss me.." and was instantly met with the kiss that she had waited years for. It was sweet and needy -albeit warm and sloppy- but just as good. And finally it broke, and she leaned back to rest in the arms of her love when she noticed a sound. One that sounded almost like...panting?

Her eyes flew open. She was face to face with a fuzzy black dog. One that gave her another hearty lick across the mouth, and barked happily.

"That...SHIGURE!!!!" she screamed out with a whole new found anger and vengeance. Mii shoved the dog off of her, growled in anger and frustration, then stormed through the house once again in a sort of destructive rage that was only comparable to the tirade of Godzilla in legends. "SHIGURE, YOU ASS!! IF I EVER FIND YOU, YOU'RE DEAD. YOU HEAR ME?! MAKING ME KISS A DOG?!! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU??!! YOU SELFISH LITTLE PIECE OF-"

"- um, Mii?" a quiet voice interrupted.

Mii froze in her place, mid-tirade, and slowly turned her head to face towards the voice. One might expect her to start spitting pea soup at any given moment, judging by the look on her face. It was the pewter haired one, and the girl with the long hair and addictive smile.

"Miss Mii, what's wrong?" Yuki asked with a concerned look on her face, and started towards her.

"That...ASS...made me kiss a dog." she replied in a venomous tone.

And with that, both Tohru couldn't help but giggle while Yuki brought a hand up to his forehead and muttered "That idiot."

For hours upon hours after the events of that afternoon, Mii stormed around the entire house, tearing apart everything in search of Shigure...with Yuki and Tohru hot on her tail and attempting to cool her off the whole time. After hours upon hours of searching, she finally gave up, completely forgetting the one thing she came for...which had been sitting on her own desk, at her office, since 8 that morning.

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Disclaimer: I do not own Fruits Basket, darn the luck. But I do own myself, my computer, and the idea to write this, so nyah!

After beginning my Noveltry series, someone suggested that the world might need a ShigureXMii fic. So I took it upon myself to make it be so. You can decide on your own If Shigure did what he did as a prank, or if he did it because of his own feelings. Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own the characters or Fruits Basket. But I own myself, so I'm still good!

This came from a request to make this into an ongoing project. Sure, why not? I love these two goofs. So.. enjoy!

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**Kiss the Dog**

**Chapter 2 **

"I don't know why she _still_ puts up with you." Hatori said stoically.

"It's because of the fact that I am a total babe magnet." Shigure replied as he waved his hand in the air. 

"Completely irresistible!" Ayame chimed in, then whispered to no one in particular "He learned it from me."

The three best friends were sitting at The Yum-Yum Bakery, discussing the events of the prior day. In her moment of weakness, Mii had apparently fallen into yet another trap of Shigure's by kissing him- only to find that she had been really kissing a dog. Shigure had managed to hide in his room until Mii (sobbing and heartbroken) finally retrieved the manuscripts from all over the floor with Yuki and Tohru's assistance and left. The scolding that he received afterwards from Yuki was well worth it.

Hatori took another sip from his cup and shook his head. "You really are too much, Shigure. One of these days you'll push her over the edge."

_**A few weeks later…**_

_ It can't possibly get any worse. He's gone as far as far can get, so there is no way that he could go further. That was it. That was the end. There isn't a thing after. So today should be fine. _Mii reassured herself as she drove to Shigure's home. The burn of his last prank was still fresh, but she wouldn't let that take over her. She pulled up in front of the big, beautiful, almost rustic vacant house and parked her car. Wait a minute…vacant? Mii face-faulted the second she stepped out of the car.

"He…just…didn't…" she said slowly to the air around her, then flew into the house on winged feet.

_But meanwhile…_

"Two beds." commented Hatori as he gave Shigure his best possible unamused face. The three men had just arrived at their hotel. Due to 'stress' and 'needing to just get away', Shigure planned a relaxing weekend in Osaka with him and the boys. "I'll be back. I am going to get my own room."

"Awww, but Haa-chan!" Shigure replied with pleading, needy eyes. "We have to stay together!"

Ayame slipped an arm around Hatori's waist and smiled at him seductively. "It's okay, Tori-chan, if I hog the bed too much, you can just get _on_ me." he added with a sexy wink.

"NO no no. No." Hatori replied as he shoved Ayame away from him. "If anything, I will have my own bed. You two perverts can just share." As he spoke, he walked to the bed closest to the door (for easy evacuation) and started piling his things on top of it.

"Ayame…this means we can be.. _together.._" Shigure cooed as he turned towards the beautiful moon-silver haired man.

Ayame tilted his head to the side and brought a hand up to stroke Shigure's cheek. Excited golden eyes met beautiful puppy dog brown ones. "Yes…just you and me, under the covers…"

"…making love.…"

"Shut up." the cold voice from afar suddenly demanded.

_Back at the homestead…_

Mii practically ripped the front door off of it's hinges shortly after reading the note taped onto it.

"Dearest Mii,

The stresses of being a master novelist are stacking up on me! I just had to get away, before I burn

out like yesterday's pop idol. Please forgive me for the delay in delivering my manuscript.

Love you, hot lips!!

♥, Shigure"

"THAT ASSHOLE!!!!!" she screamed into the air.

_And when we rejoin our travelers…_

It was a relaxing afternoon at the resort. The sun was shining, the water was clear, and the drinks were to die for. Hatori relaxed in a pool-side chair, reading a book and sipping on a glass of ice tea while the other two goofed around in the water. Other than having to keep yelling at Shigure and Ayame to stop drowning each other, he was having a pretty nice time.

"Aww, Tori-chan, why don't you come and play?" whined Ayame as they swam over to the side of the pool closest to Hatori.

"Because I don't want to." he replied coldly.

"Come on, Haa-chan, the water is nice!" Shigure chirped. The two men looked like excited children talking to their father.

"You shouldn't be such a wallflower, Tori-chan" Ayame said, with a bit of defeat in his voice.

"You shouldn't wear a bikini." came his reply as a sweat drop appeared.

Ayame lifted himself to the wall of the pool and hopped out. As his feet hit the cool tiling that surrounded the pool, he struck a little pose, and with a flick of his wrist, his hair rippled in the breeze before settling around his shoulders. The sky around him seemed to have roses floating through it as he slowly walked to Hatori's side. His playful golden eyes sparkled and a warm blush tinted his defined cheeks as he sat down on Hatori's lap, and quietly replied "Ah…but at least you noticed.."

"Go away." he yelled, and hit Ayame over the head with his book.

"Aaaayyeee!! Hatori scary!!" Aya whined as he retreated back into the pool.

"'Sokay, you have me here to protect you, Aya-chan!" Shigure replied defensively as Ayame returned to his side.

"My heeero! ♥"

_But back at home…_

Yuki and Tohru came home from grocery shopping to find quite the scene. The front door was ripped off, the living room was trashed, and oddly enough…everything else was fine, save Shigure's room/office…which was torn up, trashed, and otherwise beaten beyond recognition. In there, they found Mii, who was sitting in the middle of all of this destruction with tears flowing down her cheeks.

"Miss Mii, what's wrong?" Yuki asked as he stepped into the room.

"That Shigure…he left town without giving me…the manuscript…" she replied between sobs. "And…It's not…it's not faaaair…"

Yuki and Tohru looked at each other for a moment, then Tohru flocked to her side and put an arm around her shoulders.

"Oh, I'm sure Shigure-san didn't leave on purpose." she chimed in, hoping to raise the woman's spirits. "Did you check at your office to see if he left them there?"

Mii just nodded in response, and started crying even harder while Yuki growled. In a flash, he was out of the room and on the phone.

_Back at the resort…_

A servant walked up to Hatori and bowed. "Excuse me, sir. Are you Mr. Hatori Sohma?"

Hatori nodded in reply, and said "Yes. How may I help you?"

"Excuse me for bothering you, but you have a phone call." she said as she handed the phone to him, bowed, and stepped away to allow him privacy.

Hatori sighed and answered the phone. "Dr. Hatori Sohma speaking."

"Hatori, it's Yuki. Miss Mii is here and has torn apart the house, saying that Shigure had a manuscript due today."

_An hour or so later.._

Mii hadn't left the spot that she sat in since Yuki and Tohru found her. She just stayed there, sobbing and shaking off tears. Even once the men returned from Osaka, she stayed in that same spot. There was quite a bit of scolding to be heard, even though she really could only hear it whenever Tohru flitted to her side to check up on her and left the door open.

After an extremely long wait, the door slid open and Shigure stepped in, looking much like a child who has been scolded for pulling a girl's pigtails one time too many. He went and kneeled down in front of her.

"Mii, I apologize. I should have told you that I gave the manuscript to your secretary, and paid her $20 to keep her from telling you that she had it until 4:55 this afternoon. That was wrong of me." he said quietly, with his face contradicting his every word. He looked like he was fighting off the urge to point at her and laugh in her face.

"…I hate you." she replied, then climbed to her feet, straightened out her blue jacket, and left the room.

The moment she turned the corner and got out of earshot, Shigure collapsed on the floor, laughing. On her way out the door, Mii bowed in thanks to Hatori and Yuki, then took her leave.

"It's like watching a four year old showing his love by slipping a grasshopper down a girl's shirt, isn't it." Yuki said with clenched teeth.

"Yes, but in comparison to him…at least the four year old has more tact." came Hatori's stoic reply.

With a sigh from each one, Yuki, Ayame, Hatori, and Tohru set off to repair the damage done to the house…knowing full and well that it was sure to not last. After all, Shigure's next deadline was that very next week.


End file.
